From Shy to Confident: My Journey to 450 YouTube Videos
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Chapter 1: Confronting the Fear
I can still feel the cold sweat trickling down my back from that long-ago moment. It was three decades back, and I was just 10 years old, standing nervously with my classical guitar before a silent crowd. The blinding stage lights were a double-edged sword; they hid the disinterest of my audience but amplified my anxiety. It was the end-of-year concert at my music school, and my fear caused my fingers to slip on the strings, as always.
Despite being the most dedicated student, the fear of judgment hindered me, sapping away half of what I had practiced through countless hours. I was always the shyest one in the room, preferring to dodge social situations whenever possible. Yet, here I am today, a content creator since 2010, with over a thousand articles published in two languages and my face on countless videos across two YouTube channels.
It’s hard to believe anyone would now see me as uneasy on camera. But that transformation didn’t occur overnight.
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Section 1.1: The Push from My Mother
My mother recognized my debilitating fear early on. She likely envisioned a future where I would live in isolation, avoiding social interactions. So, she did what any caring parent would: she pushed me out of my comfort zone. I was compelled to read aloud during Mass, take on roles in school plays, and participate in music concerts, all of which involved facing an audience.
I was so anxious about speaking that I would rehearse my words on the way to the grocery store. Even now, I catch myself doing that before making phone calls. It felt akin to learning to drive on a busy highway without any prior experience.
While I wouldn’t recommend this method, it did plant the seeds of doubt about my fears. Those frightening experiences were not fatal. Yes, I blushed, stumbled over my words, and sweated profusely, but I survived.
Section 1.2: Discovering My Passion
Eventually, my mother acknowledged that I was old enough to choose my own path. It was time for passion to take over. After finishing my university studies, I believed my future lay in academia, but a challenging PhD experience pushed me in a new direction: blogging.
I began sharing photography tutorials, which naturally led me to create a YouTube channel. In a typical scenario, my fears would have concocted countless excuses to deter me from trying. But the need to earn an income online made YouTube an ideal fit for my photography website. The competition was minimal, so I took the plunge.
I started with post-production tutorials and photo critiques. My confidence was shaky, and I even received a comment that my voice was monotone. But I persevered.
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Chapter 2: The Road to Mastery
Behind the camera, I found it easier to express myself than in front of a live audience. This is the beauty of content creation: it allows you to confront your fears in a manageable way. Instead of focusing solely on myself, I could direct attention to my screen, making the experience less daunting.
The key to changing behavior lies in starting with simpler tasks and gradually increasing the difficulty. BJ Fogg, in his book Tiny Habits, emphasizes the importance of beginning with a version of your habit so straightforward that it feels effortless. Making videos became just another habit for me.
When I launched my second channel, I focused on talking-head videos. This time, I was so comfortable that I could easily discuss topics without a script.
Consistency is Crucial
My progress wasn’t instantaneous. I dedicated two years to publishing a video weekly on my photography channel, alongside several more on my second channel, until I found my rhythm.
I hate to say it, but consistency truly is the magic ingredient. After identifying the simplest version of my challenge, I faced it repeatedly until it became a normal part of my routine.
However, mere repetition isn’t sufficient. I witnessed a fellow creator publish daily for months with little improvement, as his videos fell flat. My success stemmed from passion; it drove me to continuously seek out innovative ideas and techniques.
By observing other videos, I picked up recording and editing techniques, noted obstacles I encountered, and sought solutions for future projects. I even trained myself to eliminate “uhs” and “ahs” from my speech in everyday conversations.
The fear of speaking on camera never vanished, but consistent practice dulled its sharpness. I grew accustomed to the experience, rendering it background noise. Eventually, I recognized that my anxieties were baseless, as my worst fears rarely came to fruition.
With my channel’s growth, I received encouragement from viewers, who subscribed to my email list after watching my content. This flood of support helped dispel my self-doubt.
Embracing Healthy Comparisons
Comparison can be a double-edged sword. When I’m feeling low, it can lead to self-loathing, but it can also foster growth. Without comparison, how would we learn to walk or talk?
By comparing myself to other YouTubers, I gleaned new techniques and found courage. I noticed many were consistently producing content, even if it didn’t meet high standards, and their channels were thriving.
Exploring the early videos of successful YouTubers showed me their initial struggles. This realization that everyone starts from scratch made it feel more attainable.
Finding Joy in Authenticity
I observed that many creators embraced their quirks, making them part of their brand. Throughout my life, I had presented an edited version of myself—something I continued online, which added pressure.
Realizing this behavior hindered my growth as a content creator, I began to relax. I incorporated humor, allowed minor blunders, and showcased my unique traits.
While I can’t quantify the impact this had on my metrics, I know for certain that making videos has become more enjoyable and less stressful.
Final Thoughts: Overcoming Your Fears
Every aspiring YouTuber I encounter shares a common fear of the camera, and you may feel the same way. You might delay creating your first video, crafting excuses like finding your niche or analyzing competitors.
Once you’ve exhausted all “valid” reasons, recording can take an eternity. But if you desire to be a content creator, it’s crucial to stop sabotaging your efforts.
- Reconnect with your passion. This isn’t just about profit; it’s about expressing yourself and helping others. Dig deep to find what truly motivates you.
- Start small. Consider posting screencasts to hide behind your screen or create brief videos.
- Learn from others. Observe both seasoned and novice YouTubers. Notice the minor errors they make and realize they are inconsequential. With practice, these mistakes will fade away.
- Stay observant. Consume content through the lens of your passion to identify techniques that resonate with you.
- Practice regularly. Record and publish frequently, noting your consistent mistakes, and implement small improvements.
- Monitor your analytics. Tracking growth can boost your confidence, while stagnation indicates a need for change.
- Embrace your uniqueness. Your quirks can set you apart.
Looking forward to seeing you on YouTube! 😉